Pause

April was a month of chaos for me. I left my second job, moved apartments to a new neighborhood, and got a concussion from falling outdoor rock climbing. Needless to say, I didn’t have much energy for writing.

I found myself overwhelmed with anxiety with the change and struggling with my mental health after the concussion. Fortunately, I’m feeling much better and my life is entering some more stability.

Things I did to pause from my anxiety

  • Finding a new therapist. I was having more negative than positive experiences with my previous therapist and stopped seeing her about 4 months ago. One thing that is so hard about finding a new therapist is when you need one the most, you have the least energy to do so. I just found a new one that practices CBT- cognitive behavior therapy and am excited to have researched a therapy that is more mission aligned with my values (I was previously seeing a psychotherapist).

  • Meditate first thing in the morning using Insight Timer.  I start my day using Insight Timer to meditate for 12-20 minutes. My favorite guided meditation is a Basic Vipassana with Tara Branch and anything by Sarah Blondin. They’re magic.

  • Doing Alexander Technique everyday, usually in the evening

  • Taking off one afternoon of work to relax, go to an art fair in Chelsea and walk around a new area of Manhattan with Ethan. We both have been so busy, I was feeling like we were squeezing in 1 hour blocks of time to see each other. Adventure and exploring is a core value in our relationship and I feel like we were unable to make time for it these past few weeks. This afternoon was rejuvenating and so peaceful.

  • Listen to an audiobook by Thich Nhat Hanh. Buddhist philosophy always helps calm my “monkey mind”

I have a new home that’s lovely and free time that I am deciding how to spend. I previously was working 10-15 hours a week on top of my full time job. With this new space and time, I am slowing down and listening to what I need each day. My favorite mantra from Sarah Blondin is putting my hands on my heart and my belly and saying to myself “I love you, I am listening.” Sometimes in the blur of life I lose track of myself. I forget about my priorities, what I want to focus my energy on, and how I want to live my life.

I am still moving slowly and not putting pressure on myself to do a challenge this month. I will continue to write and share about my minimalist + mental health journey, but each month may be less structured. I was finding myself feeling pressure from my own blog and realized that I create the rules here, so I can change them. A reminder that echoes into all areas of my life.